I’ve just turned 29. Woke up with a sneezing fit as usual – good to know some things don’t change.

As I was making my coffee, I found myself trying to remember what my birthdays looked like in the past years.

I remember my 19th very well. I was in my second year of university and I had just turned “legal” in Ontario, which meant I could celebrate my birthday with drinks – without having to hide them.

I can’t seem to remember what I did for my 20th or 21st birthday but I remember my 22nd – probably because there was a boy involved. I remember my 23rd in Lebanon with snow everywhere – my happy place.

I remember the childhood birthdays so vividly. It was always raining. It was always indoors at our house in Lebanon and somehow this house could fit around twenty kids and their parents if not more. And when it was time to sing happy birthday and cut the cake, all of the twenty kids and their parents would gather around the rectangular birthday table filled with everyone’s favourite food: pain au lait with jambon and butter, pain au lait with Italian mortadella, pain au lait with tuna and mayo, pain au lait with halloumi cheese, pain au lait with everything really. Croissant au chocolat, cheese, zaatar, and plain. Jello, which explains the red stained lips in all the photos. Popcorn. Hotdog rolls. And much more. The one time I wanted to do something different for my birthday, I invited my friends to an indoors swimming pool because I wanted to swim in February. We still ended up back at that rectangular table with the glorious birthday spread and I haven’t willingly gone to an indoors swimming pool since.

Every year for the past 10 years, I’ve spent my birthday with people I love but every year I’d wish I could spend it with my entire family as well. This year I can almost say I have. With all five of us under one roof, I couldn’t ask for more. Or maybe I could ask for a little more. All five of us under our roof back home having a busy pain au lait-filled birthday and this time with some wine to keep up with the red stained lips in photos. All while it rains vigorously outside of course.